Before becoming a mummy I use to love the pre-holiday body preparation of making sure everything was silky smooth and everywhere was golden brown before you left.
Now however, it is a much different picture…….
Tanning is done in a rush either in the shower (with disastrous results!), or whilst bathing the toddler. This never ends well as you will always miss the back of your legs, your toes or forget to wash your hands and look like you have washed your hands with one of the toddlers dirty nappies.
Shaving once done daily, is done when you have one of those magical showers that last longer than 4 minutes and even then you will still miss a landing strip along the side of your legs or cut yourself.
Nails when painted are done in such a rush you may have well just let the toddler do it, she would have probably done a better job. And you know full well that before they are dry the toddler will need something, or you will at that very minute need the toilet like you have never needed before. Do you do them again? Of course not you don’t have time for that sort of luxury.
Hair colour and cut, do you remember when you had this done every 6 weeks? Now it is a box colour that you do locked in the bathroom to cries of “Mummy where are you?” And cuts happen when it is only absolutely necessary and has to be kept long enough to put in a “mum bun”.
So off you go on holiday, streaky David Dickinson tan, cut legs, chipped nails and dodgy yellow hair, while the toddler and husband look like they have just walked out of a Next catalogue.