10 signs you have a toddler

You can always spot the parent of a toddler before you even see their little darling running 100 miles an hour in front of them.

Here are my  10  signs you now have a toddler;

  1. All cupboards (and fridge) are baby proofed. There is nothing more scary than the sound of the fridge door being slammed shut and your little love come running in with something out of the fridge.

  2. Everything is done at 2 speeds either really quick or really slow. Usually, when you are in a rush, is when they chose to do everything super slow.

  3. Everything is a drama. From having to eat breakfast, to putting on socks, to having apple juice when you wanted orange juice.

  4. Trying to get out the house is a military operation. You still need the usually baby crap like nappies and dummies, but now you have to take truck load of toys to keep them entertained as well.

  5. You know all the theme songs, characters and presenters on CBeebies and Nick Junior, and may secretly have a little crush on Mr Bloom.

  6. You have to make everything sound like you are going to Disney Land. “Come on, we’re going Sainsburys, it’ll be fun!!!” “Yay, lets put the washing out” You know it’s not fun, but if you don’t do it, it will result in the mother of all break downs.

  7. Clapping when someone has used the toilet will become the norm.

  8. Meal times, particularly dinner time will become the stuff of nightmares. Honestly, you may as well cut the middle man out and throw the food straight on the floor.

  9. Your house will resemble Toys R Us on crack. No matter how many toys you pass on to new homes, you will get 5 back in its place.

  10. You use bribery for the smallest of tasks. “If you put your shoes on you can have a chocolate,”, “if you go to sleep you can have a pony!!”

I’d love to hear what you would add.

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